I saw this and resisted posting it because it is so difficult.
from @johnpiper last night:
Three minutes on how I would counsel those seeking divorce or remarriage. http://ow.ly/UG7B
follow the link and this is how he starts:
Well, let’s lay the foundations for just a moment. This is just so huge and so painful and so difficult. Death is way easier to handle than divorce, right?
rougher after that, but necessary and true.
i believe you can counsel someone to leave an abusive marriage while remaining fully committed to that same marriage. i have a friend who is beaten & destroyed mentally and emotionally by a Christian husband who is irrationally obsessed with her. he recognizes his problem & has sought help in the past but is falling back into old patterns. it is possible that i would leave him, telling him that i love him completely & will wait as long as it takes for him to become healthy enough to stop abusing me. until then, i will pray & wait from a safe distance. am i wrong about this? i know the “party line” is never to divorce but i would even do that if i thought my presence in the marriage was standing between my husband and the rock bottom he needed to hit before he would seek Christ with his whole being. of course, i would remain committed to him, even while divorced, praying/planning/hoping/longing for reconciliation.